I got back from Stuttgart, still coughing (albeit less), and slept for about 2 days. Now I’m slogging through my backed-up emails and figuring out what to do next. I looks like I’ll be touring the Eastern Hemisphere most of June and July, and sub-letting my Hell’s Kitchen apartment. Interested parties please get in touch - the apartment comes with my cat Bruno, who needs daily food and love.

You’d think I’d be all overjoyed about this, but actually I’m stressed and confused. Will Sita get a distribution deal? Will it win an award? Awards drive me crazy - I always want one, “for the sake of the film,” I tell myself, but surely it’s for my ego. Press too is like coke, I always want more; google blogsearch is becoming a compulsion. I compare Sita’s progress with other films, which can’t be good. I’d like to detach from all this, but what about the festivals? This is my big chance to attend film festivals, it’s not like I can postpone them all until next year. But film festivals are orgies of comparison: who’s getting the most press? the best reviews? whose shows are selling out first? who’s getting the award? These are enemies of the Muse, and I’m not sufficiently mature to maintain my equilibrium in their midst.

Also, I am out of money and racking up expenses like you wouldn’t believe. Take “film festival rights”: publishers charge at least $500 a song just to play the film at festivals - and I don’t get money at festivals, I spend money to make the prints and stuff. I’m spending money I don’t have to get the film out there, and although something always works out, I have no idea how I’m going to pay for French subtitles (the “honor” of attending the Annecy Animation Festival is costing me over $5,000), or legal fees, or rent. Someday the film could bring money in, but I’m not sure how I’m going to make it to that day, if it ever comes.

What a whiney post this has turned out to be. On the brighter side, I’ll post next about all the sweeet reviews Sita got at Tribeca, with tasty little quotes selected by Publicity Bitch herself. But I am not Publicity Bitch. I am a servant of the Muse who is losing her way.

Apparently an American distributor rejected Sita Sings the Blues because, culturally, “it only relates to a tiny slice of the world.”

Since I can’t afford a publicist for Sita, I’m doing my own. Yes, it’s a full-time job. No, it doesn’t suit my character. Yes, I have created an alter-ego to handle this, a new sub-personality I call “Publicity Bitch.” She is shameless and aggressive and refers to me in the third person. She writes my press releases. If you’re a journalist, Publicity Bitch kindly requests you get in touch: press at sitasingstheblues dot com.

Fortunately, some press has come to me unasked, notably a new NBC documentary/reality show called My First Time. The first episode follows me and 2 other first-time feature filmmakers as we get ready for our Tribeca premieres. It will air in New York on Saturday May 3 at 7pm on WNBC; if that goes well, NBC will broadcast it nationally. Above are photos (click to enlarge) of producer/director/cameraman Jesse Zook Mann shooting yours truly here at Nina Paley Media Empire HQ.

Do you like filling in forms? Do you like putting things in envelopes? Do you like going to the post office? How about running errands? All for no money!

If this sounds like your dream job, I need someone to come to my unglamorous Manhattan studio once a week and do all of the above. You can probably get college credit for it. And learn something? Apply here.

above: just some of the mess you could help clean up!

Remember those Sita Sings the Blues posters? Well I have about 50 of each design* here, and a sharpie to sign ‘em, and a big box of mailing tubes. If you contributed $500 or more to Sita, just email me your preferred shipping address and let me know which design(s) you want and I’ll mail you one (or both) as a thank-you. Everyone else, I’ll mail you a single poster for $70, or two in the same tube for $100 (paypal only - please use “donate” button on right column). For outside the US, please add $15. But please let me know within one week, I hope to get these out the door by March 6.

*Fire (left) is European A2 size (16.5 × 23.4 inches) and Goddess (right) is the larger A1 size (23.4 × 33.1 inches).

I recently met a film producer who, after congratulating me on Sita’s admission to Berlin, patiently explained that I’m a “shiny little fish about to enter a shark tank.” I’ve long avoided thinking about the real business side of my feature film endeavor, but suddenly I’m paying attention.

Which calls to mind this audio clip. Sound Designer Greg Sextro recorded numerous improvised conversations for the ironic “Intermission” scene. Some of these are very clever; some take advantage of Indian accents; and one is even in Hindi. But I’m thinking of this one, where Will Franken channels a Hollywood executive discussing the film’s sales potential, or lack thereof. Enjoy.

As of midnight, I locked and rendered the final credits for Sita Sings the Blues. Finally! At last! I set up my machine to render the final reel of the film overnight and went to bed, exhausted.

Lying there, drifting off, I remembered I’d forgotten one name. Just one name. Couldn’t it wait until tomorrow? No! Must take hard drive to lab tomorrow! No time to re-render whole reel! So I got up, hit “cancel”, re-did the credits, and again set my machine to render reel 4 overnight. Sweet sleep at last…

Until I remembered another important credit I’d overlooked. You’d think with all the preparations I’d made, I wouldn’t have to wait until entering fugue state to recall the damn credits correctly. It’s now 1:18 am, and I’m rendering the credits for the third time in as many hours. I suspect I’ve nonetheless left out some important things and people. So, an advance apology to anyone or anything whose name is missing: I’m very sorry. I’ll correct it before it’s released, if a distributor ever picks it up. Mea Culpa.

On the other hand, the list of names and things that are included is pretty staggering. I used to joke about how short the credits would be, since I wrote, directed, produced, designed, animated, and edited the whole thing myself. But that was before “Re-Recording Mixer,” “Dub Facility” and “Dolby Sound Consultant” were even a twinkle in Sound Designer Greg Sextro’s eye. Happily, the longest addition to the credits is the list of names of generous people who donated or loaned me money to make this 35mm print. There’s like 160 of you!

Now it’s 1:30 am, and reel 4 is once again beginning its overnight render. Estimated Time: About 9 Hours. Good night!

Praise be to Laxmi!

Laxmi is both the eternal form of Sita and the Goddess of Wealth. I never really thought about her wealth aspect until now. Because my mind is so blown by the donations coming in for the 35mm master of Sita Sings the Blues.

Folks, you are kind and generous beyond my dreams. So far over $13,000 have come in. Some is from people I know in real life, but most is from people I’ve never met, mere electronic impulses from other synapses in this great hive-mind we call the Internet. I’m sitting here in awe and disbelief. I’m so grateful, so touched, so dazzled my little pea-brain can’t quite handle it. So it’s time for me to envision this as divine and offer thanks.

I thank all of you, I thank the Internets, I thank the Universe, I thank Laxmi.

The lab making the 35mm print master of Sita Sings the Blues has been delayed receiving the requisite film stock, due to a delivery error. That means they can’t print the final reel - with the credits - until Monday. And that means I don’t have to render the credits until Sunday. Which means anyone who wants their name in the credits still has until 10pm Sunday January 27 to make a donation! All donors will be thanked in the credits, but donors of $1K or more get a credit of their choice (Key Grip, Caterer, etc.) in a larger font.

Big ups and mad props to everyone making donations large and small to Sita Sings the Blues. This is really our film, not just mine - a community project. Most films are financed by big corporations, perpetuating the top-down model of American entertainment: they dictate content from above, and audiences consume what they’re handed below. But Sita seems to be funded by viewers, individual human beings who want to see it get out there. The audience is financing this film! It’s not just touching, it’s thrilling to be part of this. Thank you!!

Everyone who donates gets their name in the credits. Donors of $1,000 or more (like lenders of $2K or more) get a credit of their choosing!

Update: Credits are locking Tuesday night. Big, big thanks to you amazing generous kind wonderful donors - a post of pure gratitude is coming soon.

So the good news is, Sita is in the Berlinale. The bad news is, she’s programmed in a theater that doesn’t do Digital Cinema. That means unless I have a 35mm print by February, her one and only World Premiere will be on, well…video. I can’t let that happen.

The 35mm master will still cost about $30,000 - more if we do surround sound, which is much better audio. I still need to raise $20,000. I’m looking into bouncing credit card debt - you know, putting it all on a few credit cards, then continually applying for new credit cards and shifting the balances from one to another. It would be much better if some rich person just lent me the money. Or if some supernatural being just gave me the money - but honestly, a loan would be plenty. Big ol’ credit in the film, you can attend the Berlinale with me as part of the film team, my undying gratitude…

Here are Sita’s Berlinale screening dates, just in:

11.02.08 17:00 Kino Babylon
13.02.08 11:30 Kino Babylon
14.02.08 19:30 Kino Babylon

Let’s give all those broken-hearted Germans who are seeing the Greatest Break-Up Story Ever Told on Valentine’s Day the real 35mm experience!

Tax-deductible donations (not loans) can still be made here.

So I haven’t raised enough money to make a 35mm film print (yet). But I did raise enough to make a Digital Cinema Package, because the Stuttgart International Animation Festival offered a deal. And I borrowed enough to buy a new computer to re-render the entire 82-minute feature at a suitable higher resolution.

See, when I started Sita Sings the Blues, I couldn’t afford the processor power or disk space to work at the ideal resolution: 1920 x 1080 pixels. Instead I compromised at 1280 x 720 pixels, which in spite of being half the ideal resolution looks almost as good. The 35mm film test I did of Battle of Lanka looks great, anyway. But film has a natural grain, plus film floats around the screen a little, a result of analog frame registration (aka sprockets), both of which mask and “warm up” digital flaws. D-Cinema, however, has rock-solid registration and no grain, making it potentially less forgiving than film. Meanwhile computers and hard drives have gotten predictably cheaper since I began the project, and December is a “lost month” in New York anyway, it’s not like I’d have any freelance gigs or make any headway on promotions, and everyone gets lazy at work or leaves town, so… here I am, watching little blue progress bars for hours and days on end. Boring? You bet! But it will make the movie look infinitesimally better, so it’s all worth it. Also, D-Cinema supports 6-channel audio, so my sound designer is planning a super-duper surround-sound experience, which will make the picture look a lot better.

Update: SOLD! 12-9-07

Sure, there are lots of used dual 1.8GB G5 Towers with 2GB RAM and internal 80GB hard drives for sale at $800 (negotiable). But how many were used to make Sita Sings the Blues? Only this one. Also, it works good. I’m only upgrading because I have to re-render the entire film at higher resolution (1920 x 1080; it was 1280 x 720) and patience isn’t one of my virtues. I can also throw in a complete Final Cut Pro HD Production Suite, which is great except it won’t open fcp files made on newer Final Cut systems. No problem if you’re working alone. And I’m still hawking my excellent printer.

An ongoing feature in which I recommend the work and websites of people who buy me dinner. Today’s entry: Amandeep Jawa!

Amandeep Jawa says he’s “gregarious,” which I learned, in the few hours I got to know him, is an understatement. As we walked through Deepistan - a neighborhood comprising both Dosa, where he bought me dinner, and Bi-Rite Creamery, where I could only sample tastes lest I explode - random passersby paid their respects to their unofficial mayor. Or is that Supreme Dictator? Rumor has it part of the region may split off and re-name itself Amandesh. You can keep abreast of Deep’s political activities here, and his gregariating (new word! no google results! I win!) at his blog DeepTrouble.com. Deep is also the official Bay Area Director of Fundraising for Sita Sings the Blues, so if you want to give me a pile of money but need to preview the movie first, contact him.

Would YOU like to be featured in Eats for Endorsement? Then buy me dinner. My email address is at the bottom of the middle column, the one with the pictures linking to my movies and cartoons and stuff.

to Resist Christmas! “No Shopping, No Presents, NO GUILT.” Also visit the Christmas Resistance Blog.