Exorcise Bike, Part 3: Prayer for Exorcism

EXORCISE BIKE

(A ritual prayer for Titania’s exorcism, to be performed next week after she comes back from a thorough cleaning and parts replacement.)

In the name of Velocipe Cycladia,
Goddess of bicycles and protector of riders,
Muse of mechanics and engineers,
Who hast inspired and brought forth the greatest achievement of human technology: the Bicycle;

We confidently undertake to repulse the attacks and deceits of poor maintenance.

Cast out from this Bicycle all corrosion and corroding agents.
Defend her components from gungeing up, her metal parts from bending and snapping, her chain from stretching.
From cracks and gouges, we beg You, Great Goddess, preserve the structural integrity of her frame.
Let not her sprockets wear down, nor her bearings become pitted.
O Lady Liberator, keep forever lubricated and freely moving her chain, bearings, sprockets, cables, pulleys, and pivot points.
Protect her tires, that they not be pierced or punctured with road debris, nor worn to the casing; and keep her tubes free of leaks and tears. Grant that her struts and spokes be strong, and her wheels true.
May her bolts remain bolted,
her fasteners fast,
her clamps clamped,
her loctite tite,
and her nylocs locked.

May any mistreatment, abuse, weirdness, improper maintenance, and sadness instilled in this machine by previous handlers, be cast out now and forever.

We drive you from this bicycle:
all unclean spirits,
all corrosive powers,
all cracks and abrasives,
all incorrect lubricants, solvents, and salts.

The sacred sign of the Wheel commands you, as does also the power of the mysteries of Velosophy.

Deign, O Goddess Cycladia,
to grant this Bicycle’s rider the foresight to maintain her,
to clean her as needed, and occasionally lube her chain;
to check tire pressure and brakes before each ride;
to replace parts as they wear out;
to apply grease before bolting.
Grant this rider the strength, courage, and humility to bring forth this Bicycle unto a qualified Mechanic when necessary.

Fill this rider with the spirit of love and dedication worthy of Your blessed Bicycle, that together they glorify Thy creation.

May Velocipe Cycladia be with this bicycle,
and with thy spirit.

Amen.

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Exorcise Bike, Part 2: Velocipe Cycladia

Velocipe Cycladia is the Goddess of bicycles and cyclists.

I had to make her up, because Madonna del Ghisallo just wan’t cutting it: not enough imagery, not enough paraphernalia, and no exorcisms I could find.

My new-to-me bike Titania needs an exorcism. Sometimes, if you want something done right, you gotta do it yourself, so I am writing it. (On the other hand, if I want bike repair done right, I take it to the shop. That’s the mechanic’s expertise; mine is art and making up new religions.)

Although not before named – or perhaps under many names – Cycladia has appeared with the bicycle almost from its beginnings. Evidence is in numerous vintage posters:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I removed some of these figures from their backgrounds, for possible future use:

But the Lady Liberator, at the top of this post, is my favorite. The bat-winged helmet especially inspires awe. So she will appear again in my next post, accompanying the exorcism prayer I composed today.

 

 

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Exorcise Bike, Part 1: My Ti-Rush is Haunted

My new-to-me bike, Titania, needs an exorcism.

I bought her in June, used, off San Diego Craigslist. I’d been seeking a Ti-Rush – a rare, coveted titanium Easy racers recumbent – for years. Easy Racers is no longer in business, and used models seldom come up for sale. I stupidly passed on a size Medium right before the pandemic started; when this size Small appeared, I jumped on it, even knowing it would only just barely fit me. It took quite a bit of finagling to find someone in San Diego to pack and ship, but I managed to arrange it (and met an interesting person in the process), and the bike arrived at the end of June.

When I unpacked her, water leaked out of the frame. On our first ride, the left rear brake got loose and strummed against the spokes, which was easy enough to fix, although I did so incorrectly. I noticed her seat mesh was laced wrong. I reinforced it with zip ties, but that was an insufficient kluge.

Was the seat mesh mis-laced by a demon?

The pedals clunked; I replaced them, and when they still clunked I surmised it was a bottom bracket problem. My local bike shop replaced it, and in so doing discovered the crank bolts had been greased with motor oil. The original bottom bracket was a fancy, ceramic-bearing number, and the bike itself is fairly young, from 2014.  How did it get this much damage in just a few years?

The answer can only be A. Florida (where her previous owner rode her before he moved to California, and where humid salt air corrodes metal) and B. Demonic possession.

Over time, I came to realize that every part of her that wasn’t titanium was corroded. Her frame appears to be in fine condition, but everything else is aluminum or steel.

This kickstand is aluminum. I think the screws are steel.

The left adjustable seat support strut “sank” while I was riding, in spite of my thoroughly tightening its clamp bolt. Turns out the bolt was corroded.

The aluminum plate that holds the seat to the seat clamp broke on a ride; I had it re-fabricated by a local machine shop.

Pre-Pack Machinery made a new and improved aluminum seat plate, without the gratuitous holes.

I took apart the seat first, to find the most corroded aluminum I had ever seen. I cleaned it up with steel wool but it’s still pretty ugly.

I bought some paracord and re-laced the seat mesh (which I washed) correctly. I got new bolts for the struts.

I also got new shifters, brake levers, bar grips, front derailleur, and kickstand. The bike is currently at the shop having new parts installed. The mechanic will also clean her thoroughly and replace more bolts. Where else will he find she was lubricated with motor oil?

Meanwhile, I am preparing Titania’s exorcism, which I shall discuss in my next post.

Other than being haunted, Titania is a great bike.
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Hibiscus Teesdale

Last week I saw this very unusual recumbent for sale on Fecebook. I’m always trying to get my friends’ butts on recumbents, and this one appeared to have a more adjustable seat and size range than a typical Easy Racers bike. And look at that — Phil Wood hubs? So I bought it.

Amazingly, a visiting Chicago friend of mine was willing to meet the seller somewhere in Illinois, and the seller was willing to drive all the way from Western Iowa to meet my friend, and it miraculously worked out so that just days after my purchase, this appeared in my driveway:

Hibiscus Teesdale stuffed in the back of my friend’s small car.

The listing said the frame was built by Tom Teesdale of West Branch, Iowa. I looked him up, and discovered he was highly respected but little-known beyond hardcore bike nerd circles. He died in 2014, attending the venerable RAGBRAI cycling event. In his honor, I decided to name this purple giant Hibiscus Teesdale.

At first glance, Hibiscus appears to be an Easy Racers Fold Rush clone. I already own a Fold Rush, so I was reluctant to get another, until I looked more closely at the photos. Hibiscus is different.

Check out that jack shaft!

For one thing, she has a jack shaft. Instead of one long chain running from the crank to the rear cassette, she has two smaller chains: one from crank to jack shaft, one from jack shaft to rear chainrings. Since the Fold Rush chain often falls off and/or gets twisted when folding, this looked like a genius innovation. I could also see the handlebar stem was designed to fold in, a feature I wished my Gold Rush had. Was this the lightweight, improved-folding long-wheelbase recumbent of my dreams?

Ancient photos of the same frame design in green.

Well, no. The first thing I learned in real life was that her fold requires tools. In fact, she has an aluminum brace (the same gorgeous purple as the rest of her) that has to be unscrewed from the elastomer and unbolted from the frame before folding. There is no quick release on this brace; two wrenches are required. There is also no quick release on the handlebar stem. These are all old-school bolts, not Allen bolts, and in many different sizes, so I was glad to have a complete set of bits in my ratcheting wrench set, as well as an adjustable wrench.

Underside of the seat.

The seat, at least, has a quick-release, and is very adjustable, although you still need a wrench to adjust the seat support struts. You can see above there is plenty of room for it to slide back for taller riders, and forward for shorter ones. That makes it more versatile than a typical Easy Racers frame, but it is a whole lotta extra bike if you’re short.

Hibiscus is indeed huge. And heavy. I think she is made of steel, other than her brace. She is at least as heavy as my steel Tour Easy.

She also feels like she might be indestructible. I’m asking the seller if he knows the recommended rider weight limit. I expect she could accommodate heavier riders than anything else in my stable.

Closeup of the elastomer, which resembles a thick rubber hockey puck, between the rear tire and the seat.

Like the Fold Rush, Hibiscus has suspension created by the folding mechanism itself, similar to the suspension on a Brompton, another folding bike I cherish (I Bromptoned all over New York City when I lived there).

The ride is smooth and comfortable, but that could also be because the frame is so long, as well as the huge thick tires she came with. Usually I put narrower road tires on my ‘bents, but since she’s already wearing these wide nubbly shoes, I intentionally rode her on lousy streets, over cracks and gravel. I wasn’t looking for a gravel ‘bent, but now I have one.

Seller’s photo. I’m currently riding without the fairing (or mounts).

I thought the stiff “Cobra” style seat was an odd choice for a heavy suspended bike. I have a Cobra seat on my small Gold Rush, and the ride is very harsh, but that’s probably due to its stiff, small, aluminum frame. On this huge long suspended steel frame, the seat didn’t feel harsh at all. I liked that it held my back up straight.

8 speed cassette with Shimano Deore DX derailer.

I don’t know exactly when Hibiscus was built, but she is equipped with Shimano Deore DX components, which were apparently produced between 1990 and 1993. She has these charming bar-end shifters to match:

I’m pretty sure the handlebar foam is original. Hibiscus is remarkably well preserved for her age. I do need to replace the chains, as a few links are rusting.

Phil Wood hubs!!! I wonder if she also has a Phil Wood bottom bracket, like my modified Gold Rush, but I’m not gonna open her up to find out.

As of this writing, Hibiscus has been in my possession just over 24 hours. So far we’ve spent 17 miles together. I did many errands on her this afternoon, picking up and delivering things.

She is not fast. But the more I ride her, the more I like her. I don’t have room in my garage for 4 long wheelbase recumbents, so at some point one of my stable is going to move on. Will it be Hibiscus, or will it be Foldilocks (Fold Rush), Silver (Gold Rush), or Connie Bikeson (Tour Easy)?

Time to get a bigger garage.

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